Tuesday, November 18, 2008

W.A.D.

Won't Answer Door!
Yep...that's me.
You come selling something at my door?
I'll ignore you.
Yesterday I had a visit,
from the Schwan's Guy.
He comes often.
I wish he wouldn't.
I told him before "we're all set".
He keeps showing up.
He knocked on my door.
I hit the floor.
Commando crawled to underneath the window,
hoping he wouldn't notice that I was home.
(I'm sure the van in the driveway was a clue)
I felt silly.
I'm sure I looked idiotic.
I just couldn't turn him away AGAIN.
He's only trying to make a living.
I waited...and waited...
He knocked a few more times.
I'm thinking he knew...
Ben sort of gave me away.
He suddenly began to cough, and cough.
It was his way of tattling.
Shoot.

17 comments:

Ashlee said...

Aren't kids stinkers that way. :0) I've totally tried to ignore the door before. Sometimes...I'm just not open for "visitors".

Ashlee said...

Did you at least buy something good from the Schwans man?

Cindi said...

Been known to do that myself a time or two...especially if I am still in my pj's or my house is disastrous!!! I actully had someone knock at 1:30 AM the other night...it was pretty freaky! I was up with a headache, tv was on, so maybe someone ran out of gas or something. It wasn't frantic knocking or anything...Richard was upstairs sleeping, so I stayed right on the couch!!! Didn't sleep the rest of the night though! Too fwightened!!!

LL said...

love the hit the floor act. I've done that before...as I'm shouting at my kids (under my breath) to be QUIET..."we're not home" Jane looks at me like "uh YES we are!" and she runs to the door.
Glad to know Ben outed you :) makes me laugh.

Primarymary said...

I ignore the door most of the time, unless I am expecting someone. I never open the door unless its a neighbor I recognize.
My standard answrer to solicitors is, "I'm sorry the homeowner isn't available and that is something she would have to approve."

Smilin' sunshine said...

I love that! Kids always are ratting out! They help keep us honest!

Adam and Anya said...

I love the "We're all set" comment.

You know, they don't say that here in AZ. In fact, Adam served his mission in New York and when he would knock on doors, people would always say "We're all set".

He never recovered from those words. Too funny!!!

ChefTom said...

I used to have a sprinkler set up on my front lawn that sprayed across the sidewalk, I would look to see who it was, if they were selling something or JW, I could open the closet door and hit the manual on button and they would have to run through the sprinkler when they decided I was not answering the door. It also works with the home teachers when they show up the last day of the month, 45 minutes late or totally un-expected. The little showers always made me feel better.

Becky said...

LOVE.IT! How do I get ME one of THOSE? (cheftom - will you come install one for me?)

Jenny said...

Look. Just answer the door. Here is where you get creative. Come to the door holding a bowl and muss up your hair really good. Put on the really sick face and when he starts to ask if you need anything, start to gag and run for the toilet. He probably won't stick around for the follow-up conversation.

Erica said...

Our Schwan's guy comes the same time, every other Saturday. Sometimes we just have to say "we're all set", too. But, yeah, even if Ben didn't cough, the van IS a dead give-away!

Schenewarks said...

He's only so faithful because your good husband kept him in business and in the running for salesman of the week contests with his "Becky's sick, better stock the freezer" philosophy. We loved helping you clean out all those fudgsicles and frozen fruit mixes, by the way ;

ChefTom said...

In Arizona if you want plants or grass to live you MUST have sprinklers, the easiest way to deal with this little chore is to put them on a timer to automate them. It was not a planned placement on my part, I just turned it a little to achieve the desired effect. Nothing better than a couple of JWs shielding their pamphlets as they run through the sprinklers.

Mostly Stacie's Space said...

HeHeHe... you bad girl you. :) I need to be bad that way more often. Not that anyone ever comes to my house. I keep it clean on the rare, off chance that someone might show. I think I would even let you shwan man in just to show off. Love ya Stacie

Anonymous said...

As a 'Schwan's guy', I still can't understand why people are afraid to confront someone who visits you once or twice a month. For some, that's more visits than from friends and family.

If we confronted things more often in life, we would all be more productive and feel more secure about ourselves.

Becky, do Schwan's a favor; save us a return trip later in the day (since you're "not home" ;) ;) ), save us fuel in our vehicles (and maybe we wouldn't pass our fuel charges onto our customers) and allow us to service customers who aren't afraid to say 'no' when we arrive or request that we stop back later in the day.

If you don't want him or her visiting every two weeks, just tell them to stop by every four weeks.

I've 'busted' customers like you on many occasions. And guess what, Becky? They now communicate with me! And guess what else? Not only does my day run more efficiently, but so do theirs! Try it you'll like it!

And if you still can't bring yourself to confront us, do what I suggest to my customers; if you're not going to be home or if you don't want to answer the door. Leave me a note on the door. Like, "Nothing today. Thanks!" or "Stop back after 7:30"

I don't care how my customers present themselves when I visit them. My job is to service you, not judge you.

-Ron

Perhaps if you communicate and get to know your Schwan's guy, you wouldn't be so afraid to confront them. You might even appreciate them more than you do now.

Becky said...

Hey Ron...thanks for your comment. Actually I have communicated with my guy...more than once. Problem is? They keep changing 'guys'. Your service is not in my budget right now and so that's why I have told them "I'm all set". (they keep coming though)

PS: Do I know you? And how the heck did you find my blog? Just a curious question. :)

Anonymous said...

No, you don't know me, Becky; I'm from Ohio, though I don't know where you reside.

I get "Schwan's" Google Alerts through my e-mail, thus I was given a link to your blog when you mentioned Schwan's.

Changing 'guys', I hear you. It's mostly turnover and partly corporate changes.

One thing I can tell you- Schwan's will be increasing their product offerings considerably over the course of 2009, including new product lines.

-Ron