MY LIFE AS A SUB...(part 2)

Tuesday morning was like most mornings.  Steve's alarm clock went off at 5am, he hit snooze a couple of times before waking Kayla up for early morning seminary.  I roll over, pretending that I might actually fall back asleep. But between the lights being turned on, the ruckus in the bathroom, dogs stirring and Steve eventually calling everyone in to my bed for morning prayers...it doesn't usually happen.  5:45am we say our prayers as a family and then Kaleb climbs into the spot that Steve leaves vacant, Stevie stumbles back to bed and Kayla and Steve leave for the day.  While I'm pretending to sleep, I say my own prayer..."please let the call of the subbing guru pass over my head this day".  (over and over again)  The phone lies underneath my pillow because it serves doubly as an alarm clock.  5:55am, the phone vibrates under my head.  The prayers go unheard that morning.  I answer the phone.  I'm wanted in the Middle School as a gym teacher.  My first thoughts are "Ugh.  I'm going to have to keep 40-50 kids entertained all by myself for the day."  My second thought?  "I get to wear comfortable clothes."  (trying to see the positive here)  I drag myself out of bed, make the kids breakfast and their lunches, wake them up and head out the door soon after.  I drop the kids off at school, and head to the next town over to start my long day.  Good news, I find out I'm not the only gym teacher for the day.  "I'll just be the helping hand" I think to myself.  This will be easy.  WRONG.  Our first class of the day: 42 7th graders.  It's raining outside which means we're staying inside to play 'whiffle ball'.  I knew it was going down hill fast when chaos ensued inside the locker rooms.  We get all the kids in the gym and the real gym teacher takes attendance.  (this guy looks like he's 18 and stands about 5'4.)  Then he breaks the class in two and sends half the kids to the field, and the other half at bat. He's the pitcher.  I'm the jail warden for the kids standing against the wall waiting to bat.  Did I say 'standing against the wall'?  More like pushing and shoving, slamming and ramming, fighting and biting.  The kids in the field?  They were playing keep away with the ball from the gym teacher while shoes are flying, kids physically and verbally abusing other kids.  Somewhere in the middle of all this, a bat goes flying (unbeknown to me because I was in the middle of a fight), hits me in the stomach/spleen area and about knocks the wind out of me.  And this was just the first class.  During the middle of my day, when I was on break for lunch...I sat in the guidance department and had a conversation with an 8th grader who was sitting in there because he was in trouble.  He figured out that I was "Officer Orton's wife" and told me how he's arrested him before.  I asked him why and he explains that he was carrying about 10 oxycontin pills.  So I proceed to ask him why he would do that and has he learned his lesson.  His answer?  "Yes, I've learned not to get caught."  He told me he doesn't use, but he DOES drink.  "What 14 yr old kid doesn't drink?" was his question to me.  "MINE!" I told him.  I learned that this kid was 7yrs when his mother taught him how to shoot up with heroin.  He currently lives with dad who doesn't have time for him.  As much as a punk that he is...I wanted to take him home.  I finished my lunch and our conversation and back to the gym I headed.  One more 7th grade, two 8th grade and one 50+ kids in the 6th grade class later and I was RUNNING out the door.  I arrived home, kicked my shoes off and fell into a coma.  $8 an hour.  That's what I get paid to sub.  Know what's great?  My kids.  I'm grateful for my children, my well behaved (mostly), polite and respectful children.  The end.