Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I MANAGED...


to  survive my first day without the kids.  I had so much anxiety about it all summer.  I worried about how it would feel not to be busy all day long with Ben.  After I got the kids off to school, I normally would spend a couple of hours finishing his morning feeds, giving him medicine, washing him up and dressing him.  Then I would do his face and mouth care, comb his cute wrinkly head and carry him downstairs for the day.  That was one of my favorite parts.  Carrying him.  I loved to wrap his legs around my waist and place his arms up over my shoulders.  Then I would carry him down the stairs while whispering in his ear in my cutesy voice..."Ben, do you love when mommy carries you?"  I know he did.  Then I would sit and hold him or put him in his giant beanbag on that darn vent.  The vent that limited his portability.  (sigh)  But it did give him more time with us so I can't begrudge that vent too much.  The rest of the school day I would stay busy with house work, appointments for Ben, bills, etc.  I found that today I stayed just as busy.  I dropped the kids off and came home to finish up some morning chores.  At 10am I was off to a chiropractor appointment and my Muay Thai class immediately after.  Then I was invited by my husband to come have lunch with him at the High School.  I was giddy as a school girl.  Lunch with my husband at my leisure?  FUN!  I returned home after a nice casual date to fill water bottles with ice for my children who would soon be practicing their sports in the nearly 100 degree weather.  (secretly I'm loving this heat wave)  I mosey on down to the field where I run 2-3 miles, depending on my mood, on the track.  It's a good way to pass the time.  After I'm done running, I read my latest, greatest book until practice is over.  Today I kidnapped all of my sweaty, stinky children and headed down to the lake where we ALL jumped in with our clothes on.  Man was that refreshing.  We returned home where I filled out a GAZILLION papers for the school, made them dinner, read some scriptures, said our prayers and sent them to bed.  WHEW!  Not much time for mourning today.  I guess that's a good thing.  Oh, and did I mention that in between all of that I had many phone calls, emails, text messages all wondering how I was doing on this first day of school.  ME!  People were worried about ME!  I felt loved.  Thank you.  Thank you for caring about me.  I'm hanging in there.  One day at a time, right?

9 comments:

Jenny said...

That's all you can do. One breath, one step, one hour, one day at a time.
XO
Hooray for today!
And bravo for jumping in clothes and all.

ANewKindOfPerfect said...

What an awesome day. :)

Christy said...

YOu are so full of life Becky! With a mind like yours, you will always find joy in your days.

(can't say I agree with the love of the heat though)

The Kings said...

Oh I'm SO glad the day was a good one. I hope every other day while the kids are at school are full of things to keep you busy and as happy as you can be without your beautiful Ben to carry down the stairs :)

LL said...

I'm so happy to hear this!
I hope there are many more days like this in your future...just not so hot!
:)

Jo Jo said...

That paperwork comment gave me the shivers. Just finished mine after two weeks! Way to manage the day.

Zach Hutchins said...

Hey Beck, you look about twelve in that picture! Glad your back-to-school isn't stressful; mine's been sort of busy.

April said...

I'm so glad your day was full of good things... way to JUMP RIGHT IN. I love you and am thinking of you during this season...

TMI Tara said...

I'm glad you had a day filled with good things. I'm sure Ben was with you, but HE was carrying YOU for once. I bet he liked that. A lot. Love you.