MORTIFIED

Where to begin....as most of you know, we own two pugs. One named Sue and the other is Max. Both are really good dogs exept for the occasional potty accident. For the most part Sue, who is 2, is great - as long as all bedroom and basement doors are shut. He (yes it's a he - long story) is great on the main floor of the house. Max is the younger pug at 10 months old and is paper trained. We keep a chuck (absorable mat) by the back door and if we aren't quick enough to see that he wants to go out, he will go on the chuck. No big deal, we just roll it up and throw it out - no harm done. Life with animals is always an adventure. The thing with Max is that if you happen to leave an item of clothing on the floor he mistakes that for a chuck. It's almost like an open invitation for him to do his business. AAAGGGGHHHHH! So...I'm constantly telling the kids when I see their clothes on the floor to pick them up or you might get a surprise from Max.

Today I was in the basement with Ben (where it is nice and warm) because he had physical therapy, a home nursing visit due to a blister on his heel and a lady that came to fit him for his new car seat. My home was like a revolving door this afternoon, one visit after the other. The last lady who was there to help me with getting a new car seat was CRANKY! She was very upset because Denise, Ben's PT was scheduled to be there but due to a kink in her schedule she couldn't be. She instead made the visiting nurse stay to oberve Ben's car seat fitting. The poor nurse needed to leave but cranky lady was a little demanding. Whew! We were in the basement for about 20 minutes or so and the nurse was finally able to leave. We stayed there a little longer because this lady (who will continue to remain nameless) had me sign a bunch of papers. When that was done we headed up to the living room because I was sending back some equipment that Ben was through with. I (thankfully) was in front of her and noticed that there was a coat on the floor and panicked briefly thinking it was this lady's coat - but after a nano second I realized that it was Kaleb's. I quickly picked it up but as I stepped into the entry way to our house, my eyes again were drawn to the floor as I noticed another coat (that I didn't recognize) on the floor with a pile of doggy poo on it. It was HER coat. You have got to be kidding!! What I want to know is, did cranky lady hang her coat up and it then fell? Did she just throw it down as she walked in? I never saw because I was in the basement with Ben. Did Max sense her crankiness because he chose her coat over Kaleb's? Questions to ponder...Meanwhile, she was right on my heels when I noticed this most horrific scene and so in a terrible panick I shook the coat as I picked it up shaking free the pile of poo which fell to the floor. I proceeded to throw Kaleb's coat over the evidence. Acting as if I was merely picking her coat off the floor I went to hang her coat up when she mentioned that it was her coat and could she have it (gulp), so I handed it to her. Thankfully we headed right out the door to fit the trial car seat in my van because the odor of the brown little pile started to become a little pungeant. Thank goodness for fresh air. When she wasn't looking, I opened the house door and motioned Kaleb over with that silent "get over here NOW!" hand gesture to handle the problem under his coat. I went back out to the van as she was fitting the seat in the car when I noticed there was some evidence left on the back of her coat (double gulp)! I couldn't even focus on what she was doing, I could only focus on that small spot on her coat. How could I say something after I already tried to get away with it the first time? I kept trying to think of how to remedy the problem....but I was too mortified to even speak. It all happened so fast my head was spinning. She left and I never said anything. As I watched her pull out of my driveway, it was then that I decided that I am the worst person on the planet.

Go ahead...let the judgements begin...